Resources

Useful resources – You get to choose.

Self-care is crucial, especially when grieving. Grief impacts our body and mind, so instead of hoping time will heal, it’s better to take action and learn some self-help tools. When anxiety and sadness take over, we can either drown in these emotions or learn to regulate them.

Grief is a unique journey with no set timelines or rules. There’s no single tool or technique that heals all our hurt. Here are some tools we’ve explored and found helpful to varying extents. This isn’t an exhaustive list, advice or recommendation; feel free to pick, choose, and discard as you see fit.

Breathing

Can be one of the most simple, effective and essential strategies. Simply learning to breath correctly and mindfully in times of stress and anxiety can regulate your nervous system. Box breathing, 4-7-8, double breath are all useful skills to practice.

Havening

Another helpful self regulation technique using personal touch. I really like this.

You can watch on the Peaceful Heart Network App

Tapping (EFT - Emotional Freedom Technique or TTT - Trauma Tapping Technique)

Tapping on accupoints on our hands, face and upper body stimulates the central nervous system and causes the body to release helpful chemicals.

The following app from Peaceful Heart Network is free to use and has resources for breathing exercises, havening and tapping. It may look simple and childlike but it was developed this way to overcome language barriers and also so children can easily use it.

It’s free to use. There is a link for both android and Apple devices.

android devices – Self Help for Trauma – Peaceful Heart Network

Apple devices – Self Help for Trauma – Peaceful Heart Network

An alternative tapping app is The Tapping Solution. I enjoy the guided tapping sessions which add words and mantras to the tapping. Some are free, others require a paid subscription.

The Tapping Solution – Relax, Stress Less, Sleep Well app

Meditation

I’ve tried all kinds of meditation. Some of it jars with me, but I do like the sound of these guys! There is an abundance of great options to consider using your favourite music app. Look up guided meditation or meditation for anxiety, or sleep or whatever is your challenge.

The Honest Guys – High Quality Meditations and Relaxation

Sleep

Do you sleep too much or not at all or somewhere in between?

Dr Micheal Mosley’s CBT podcast sleep well, offers some scientific research on sleep and some techniques to help drift off…

Sleep Well – with Michael Mosley

Nutrition

It’s common to eat too much rubbish or not eat at all when grieving, but it’s important to look after yourself, however hard it might feel. Food gives us energy and helps our brains function properly. What does you’re current diet look like?

Getting sober

Grievers do many things to self soothe. Tempting as it might be, alcohol can feel like an easy relief, the truth is that alcohol can actually perpetuate grief. This is because alcohol functions as a depressant in the body, slowing the central nervous system and brain. This makes it harder for people to process their emotions and can leave their feelings unresolved.

Creativity and grief

Using your creativity to deal with loss is a great way to safely express yourself. Wether that is on your own or within a class or group.

Mindfulness - 5 Steps to wellbeing

Connect with others- find a sense of belonging and share experiences
Be physically active – setting small goals / challenges & achieving them changes brain chemistry & enhances mood
Learn new skills – boosts self confidence, connects with others and builds a sense of purpose
Give to others (not financial) – acts of kindness – say thank you, help someone with a task, volunteen
Pay attention to the present moment – Mindfulness – what can I see, hear, touch, feel & taste. Have a mindful walk

Mind – 5 ways to wellbeing

Wading through grief can be a huge challenge that we’re simply not equipped to deal with.

If you need some urgent support you can reach out now to;

The Samaritans – Call free on 116 123

The Crisis team – 0303 123 1145 / 0800 652 2863